Age of Love: Companion Shows
I love Age of Love so much that I’ve been inspired to come up with my own reality dating ideas that could be companion shows in the following timeslot.
1) A desirable bachelor is forced to decide between two types of women: women with really big tits versus women with really small tits. At the end of the first episode, though, we find out the crazy twist: All the women with big tits also have hugely loose vaginas, while the women with small tits have super tight Southern teenager vaginas. Throughout the ten episodes, he gets to know both the big jugged and itty titted on a series of fun dates like surfing, making pottery at Color Me Mine, and getting blowjobs in the bathroom of Color Me Mine. This show would be hosted by Levar Burton.
2) Three poor women vie for the affections of a hot young millionaire. The twist: he is actually married with a young son and has no plans to get a divorce. The three poor women all end up emotionally decimated. Hosted by Tony Shalhoub from Monk.
3) A desirable guy decides what girl he wants to date from a pool of twenty sexy girls. The twist: they are prostitutes, and he is a serial killer who tortures women in a secret room hidden behind his washer/dryer. I already have Brooke Burke attached.
4) Five hot women compete to win the attention of a hipstery guy who is OK looking but nothing special, and makes a decent but not great living as a web designer. The twist: he is going to fuck all of them and then never call again. This isn’t so much a show as what happens in every bar in America every night.
July 19th, 2007 at 8:48 pm
That first one might work, but only if Levar Burton has to wear the Visor he wore when he played Geordi on Star Trek. And every time they cut from one big-boobed (or bitty-boobed) contestant to the other, they have to play those three notes they’d play in-between each of the children’s book reviews on Reading Rainbow. And one of the contestants insists on calling him Kunta Kinte, and Levar gets exponentially annoyed at this.
July 20th, 2007 at 9:31 am
Show #1 – Currently airing on VH1 (under the synonym Rock of Love).
Show #2 – Fits perfectly on A&E.
Show #3 – MTV, home for hipsters and sixteen year olds with no self-esteem.
July 20th, 2007 at 1:29 pm
You had me at “Levar Burton.”
Why do I get the feeling that there are some subtly rampant emotions and unpleasant experiences snugly nestled behind at least one of these ideas…?
August 8th, 2007 at 12:04 am
Oh, Jessi. I know you are as pissed as i am about the finale. i’m never watching tv again. i want to hear what you’ve got to say.